....to celebrate, shoes of fabulousness.
Not, I hasten to add, full price.
Wednesday, 29 July 2009
Thursday, 23 July 2009
Day 39 - what is it with breakfast food?
Every single morning that I go to work, I will, without fail, have the following dialogue with myself as I walk along the platform in London.
Ethel: Oh look, you've arrived in London, that means its time for yummy breakfast items. What shall you have? Bagel? Breakfast baguette? Croissant with egg and bacon? Sausage McMuffin? Toast? Mmmm, toast.
Me: No, I had breakfast, I had a shake and I don't need anything else. Besides, I'm not hungry. And I choose to do cambridge and see excellent results. Go away, Ethel.
Ethel: But smell that hot bread baking in Pret; see the man with the croissant....look, a skinny girl with a mcmuffin, you could have one of those and get away with it - you want one, you want one
Me: No, but yeah, but....Yeah you're right, I do want something. Croissant? What would do the least damage?
Ethel: Well, go on then, it'll be niiiiiiice, and you were up so early, work is so miserable, you deserve a treat, don't you.
Me: No. Coffee. Only coffee. I shall remain firm.
Ethel: Ok, well have something to go with your coffee then? Something small? Look, they do muffins in here.
Me: Shut UP Ethel!
"Shut up Ethel" is my mantra on this diet. Ethel, for those that don't know, is the devil on my shoulder. She's me, of course. She's the bit of me that still thinks food is a suitable reward for getting up early; a compensation for having a hard time at work. The bit of me that recalls the years and years of habitually buying breakfast when I got off the train to work.
(For years I commuted through Charing Cross, and Villiers Street next to the station has the following: Pret, Starbucks, Bagels, a little cafe, Costa, Eat.....masses and masses of carb-laden breakfast over the years contributed significantly to me being sixteen stone)
I guess we all have an Ethel. The trick seems to be not making her go away, but learning to listen to that side of ourselves and then choosing to acknowledge it but not act upon it. I don't think its possible to get rid of Ethel altogether, is it? Maybe Ethel will be a bit less vocal in time, but at the moment, she's pretty strident.
Its becoming tiresome, and boring, to have this conversation with myself every day. Its so Pavlovian - the result of years of conditioning. 'Cannon Street, this train terminates here. All change' triggers Ethel from her slumber like a bloody dog salivating at the sound of a bell.
In other news: at WI this week (Monday) I had shed another four lb, so taking me to 24lb in five weeks. Its times like that that enable me to put Ethel back in her box!
Stats (as of Monday)
Weight: 13'3
Lost: 24lb
To target: 32lb
Ethel: Oh look, you've arrived in London, that means its time for yummy breakfast items. What shall you have? Bagel? Breakfast baguette? Croissant with egg and bacon? Sausage McMuffin? Toast? Mmmm, toast.
Me: No, I had breakfast, I had a shake and I don't need anything else. Besides, I'm not hungry. And I choose to do cambridge and see excellent results. Go away, Ethel.
Ethel: But smell that hot bread baking in Pret; see the man with the croissant....look, a skinny girl with a mcmuffin, you could have one of those and get away with it - you want one, you want one
Me: No, but yeah, but....Yeah you're right, I do want something. Croissant? What would do the least damage?
Ethel: Well, go on then, it'll be niiiiiiice, and you were up so early, work is so miserable, you deserve a treat, don't you.
Me: No. Coffee. Only coffee. I shall remain firm.
Ethel: Ok, well have something to go with your coffee then? Something small? Look, they do muffins in here.
Me: Shut UP Ethel!
"Shut up Ethel" is my mantra on this diet. Ethel, for those that don't know, is the devil on my shoulder. She's me, of course. She's the bit of me that still thinks food is a suitable reward for getting up early; a compensation for having a hard time at work. The bit of me that recalls the years and years of habitually buying breakfast when I got off the train to work.
(For years I commuted through Charing Cross, and Villiers Street next to the station has the following: Pret, Starbucks, Bagels, a little cafe, Costa, Eat.....masses and masses of carb-laden breakfast over the years contributed significantly to me being sixteen stone)
I guess we all have an Ethel. The trick seems to be not making her go away, but learning to listen to that side of ourselves and then choosing to acknowledge it but not act upon it. I don't think its possible to get rid of Ethel altogether, is it? Maybe Ethel will be a bit less vocal in time, but at the moment, she's pretty strident.
Its becoming tiresome, and boring, to have this conversation with myself every day. Its so Pavlovian - the result of years of conditioning. 'Cannon Street, this train terminates here. All change' triggers Ethel from her slumber like a bloody dog salivating at the sound of a bell.
In other news: at WI this week (Monday) I had shed another four lb, so taking me to 24lb in five weeks. Its times like that that enable me to put Ethel back in her box!
Stats (as of Monday)
Weight: 13'3
Lost: 24lb
To target: 32lb
Tuesday, 14 July 2009
Day 30 stats update
Haven't posted the stats for a while so here they are:
Weight today - 13'7
Lost - 20
To target - 36
Weight today - 13'7
Lost - 20
To target - 36
Day 30 - three is the magic number
Weighed in last night and 3lb off, so totalling 20lb in four weeks. I'm really very pleased with that....ok, it would have been more if I'd not had the hideous wagon-falling incident in week 2, but there we go. Can't do much about that now! 20lb in four weeks though - apart from LL, LT etc, show me another diet that delivers those results!
And 3lb a week is meant to be 'the average'. Am v happy being Ms Average this week.
We learned this on LL....1.5 stone (or thereabouts) is where People Notice. Yesterday I had SO many people ask me 'have you lost weight?' - most pleasing indeed that it does show. Helped, I guess, by the fact that I was wearing clothes that fit me for the first time in ages. I had an enormous clearout on Sunday and threw out everything that no longer fits, plus everything that does/could fit for a bit longer but I simply do not like. I'm not left with much, but that's fine. I've set aside this year's bonus, such as it is, to buy some new stuff further down the line. Now all I have to do is win two tickets to NYC and I'm all set.
Had a really interesting conversation on the way home with friend A from work. She has recently also lost weight and we both find it really difficult to 'see' ourselves as others do. I've long said I have 'reverse body dysmorphia' in which I look in the mirror, think 'yeah you look ok' then see photographs and realise that I look horrendous and what I see is not what the rest of the world sees. But then when i try to compare myself to random women in the street (sorry, random women) I think I compare to women who are bigger than me. A thinks she is much bigger than she is too. So we spent the walk to the station picking out passing women and establishing whether we thought we were bigger or smaller than them, and trying to find people to compare to. The other gave honest opinions....and what we realised was that our self-images are completely arse-backwards, 'pissed', and just plain wrong.
I read somewhere that it can take five years (years!) for your head to catch up with your body when you lose weight. I do hope that isn't true. otherwise A is going to have to follow me around for the next five years helping me understand what I look like (and vice versa!)
New purchase today - Eva Fraser's book and dvd on facial fitness. I can't believe this woman was born in 1928. http://www.evafraser.com/
And 3lb a week is meant to be 'the average'. Am v happy being Ms Average this week.
We learned this on LL....1.5 stone (or thereabouts) is where People Notice. Yesterday I had SO many people ask me 'have you lost weight?' - most pleasing indeed that it does show. Helped, I guess, by the fact that I was wearing clothes that fit me for the first time in ages. I had an enormous clearout on Sunday and threw out everything that no longer fits, plus everything that does/could fit for a bit longer but I simply do not like. I'm not left with much, but that's fine. I've set aside this year's bonus, such as it is, to buy some new stuff further down the line. Now all I have to do is win two tickets to NYC and I'm all set.
Had a really interesting conversation on the way home with friend A from work. She has recently also lost weight and we both find it really difficult to 'see' ourselves as others do. I've long said I have 'reverse body dysmorphia' in which I look in the mirror, think 'yeah you look ok' then see photographs and realise that I look horrendous and what I see is not what the rest of the world sees. But then when i try to compare myself to random women in the street (sorry, random women) I think I compare to women who are bigger than me. A thinks she is much bigger than she is too. So we spent the walk to the station picking out passing women and establishing whether we thought we were bigger or smaller than them, and trying to find people to compare to. The other gave honest opinions....and what we realised was that our self-images are completely arse-backwards, 'pissed', and just plain wrong.
I read somewhere that it can take five years (years!) for your head to catch up with your body when you lose weight. I do hope that isn't true. otherwise A is going to have to follow me around for the next five years helping me understand what I look like (and vice versa!)
New purchase today - Eva Fraser's book and dvd on facial fitness. I can't believe this woman was born in 1928. http://www.evafraser.com/
Thursday, 9 July 2009
Day ? I forget...er...25 - late Week 3 WI update
I promised to 'update tomorrow' didn't I....and didn't. Ah well. I can't imagine the world has particularly noticed my little blog being a few days late.
Weighed in late on Monday night and was pleased to have lost 5lb, so taking my overall total to 17lb in three weeks. Which is pleasing.
Since then, things haven't been altogether brilliant, not just CD wise but generally. Husbands car accident last week continues to be a bit of an issue; just getting car repaired seems to be unclimbable mountain. Swine flu (and suspected swine flu) abounds at work, I am severely short handed but we struggle on. And I've got a really, really, REALLY very annoying scratchy throat; even saw the nurse today but apparently nothing wrong....so why does my throat feel so wrongity wrong? Might try Piriton next in the hope it is hayfeverey scratchyness. (are those actual words?)
I've been very picky, sorry to say; have sneaked a bit of ham, and a bit of cheese. Disappointing - and I do recognise, the start of a slippery slope, so I'm recommitting as of NOW. No more.
Have had the most bizarre cravings this week. Well, not bizarre like coal or anything, but just an odd assortment of things. A few include
Jacob's cream crackers
Corned beef
Sausage and egg mcmuffins
Curry
Pickled onions
Nothing sweet - but that's easily explained - I live on chocolate milkshake!
and now I'm rambling. Back to Celebrity Masterchef.
Weighed in late on Monday night and was pleased to have lost 5lb, so taking my overall total to 17lb in three weeks. Which is pleasing.
Since then, things haven't been altogether brilliant, not just CD wise but generally. Husbands car accident last week continues to be a bit of an issue; just getting car repaired seems to be unclimbable mountain. Swine flu (and suspected swine flu) abounds at work, I am severely short handed but we struggle on. And I've got a really, really, REALLY very annoying scratchy throat; even saw the nurse today but apparently nothing wrong....so why does my throat feel so wrongity wrong? Might try Piriton next in the hope it is hayfeverey scratchyness. (are those actual words?)
I've been very picky, sorry to say; have sneaked a bit of ham, and a bit of cheese. Disappointing - and I do recognise, the start of a slippery slope, so I'm recommitting as of NOW. No more.
Have had the most bizarre cravings this week. Well, not bizarre like coal or anything, but just an odd assortment of things. A few include
Jacob's cream crackers
Corned beef
Sausage and egg mcmuffins
Curry
Pickled onions
Nothing sweet - but that's easily explained - I live on chocolate milkshake!
and now I'm rambling. Back to Celebrity Masterchef.
Sunday, 5 July 2009
Day 21 - I like this place and willingly could waste my time in it
The above quote is from As You Like It, which I saw on Friday night in Stratford (-upon-Avon, not the one in east London) and to me it seems apposite on two levels. Firstly, I do very much like Stratford and could willingly live there and 'waste my time in it'. I could even do something useful in it, it doesn't have to be a timewaste. That would be nice - but for now, not really practicable. Hey ho. Secondly, I can relate it to this diet....having reached ketosis - again - I realise just how good it is to be here and not to be struggling. And cheating means struggling. So, I've found it really quite simple this weekend to stay 'on plan'. Which is all to the good. I even managed to go to a restaurant with Mr S and keep him company whilst he ate a (yummy looking) pizza and chocolate pudding, just ordering water/coffee etc and not giving a stuff about what the staff thought. Here's some other 'good' things from this weekend....
- Drank only water on the car journey (ok, so that did mean 3 stops on a 3 hour journey) - usually we'd pick at sweets and crisps the whole way
- Had a shake when I got there then nothing all pm
- Met the lovely Ruth and drank black tea and water and didn't mind one bit not having a big stonking cake to go with
- Sat with Mr L whilst he had a jacket spud/chicken dinner and only whinged a little bit
- Went to theatre - twice - and had no sweets
- Went to the Dirty Duck - twice - and very nearly automatically ordered my usual large glass of red but remembered and didn't
- didn't go to breakfast in the b&b at all today, and yesterday just had coffee
As You Like It and Julius Caesar in one weekend - fantastic. I've got to mention Mariah Gale who played Rosalind so very, very well (she's the understudy, and I don't know for sure but I suspect it was her first night in the role) and Sam Troughton, who was amazing as Brutus in JC....such a good actor. And we had lovely weather, and there was a river festival to waste time at, so all in all I've had a fabulous time.
Short blog post as not really much to say, other than I'm dead chuffed to have been away for the whole weekend and dealt with it well.
Weigh in tomorrow. I know what my own scales suggest, but I'm keeping my own counsel on that until after tomorrow night's WI. I'm not dreading it as much as last week, though. Will update tomorrow!
- Drank only water on the car journey (ok, so that did mean 3 stops on a 3 hour journey) - usually we'd pick at sweets and crisps the whole way
- Had a shake when I got there then nothing all pm
- Met the lovely Ruth and drank black tea and water and didn't mind one bit not having a big stonking cake to go with
- Sat with Mr L whilst he had a jacket spud/chicken dinner and only whinged a little bit
- Went to theatre - twice - and had no sweets
- Went to the Dirty Duck - twice - and very nearly automatically ordered my usual large glass of red but remembered and didn't
- didn't go to breakfast in the b&b at all today, and yesterday just had coffee
As You Like It and Julius Caesar in one weekend - fantastic. I've got to mention Mariah Gale who played Rosalind so very, very well (she's the understudy, and I don't know for sure but I suspect it was her first night in the role) and Sam Troughton, who was amazing as Brutus in JC....such a good actor. And we had lovely weather, and there was a river festival to waste time at, so all in all I've had a fabulous time.
Short blog post as not really much to say, other than I'm dead chuffed to have been away for the whole weekend and dealt with it well.
Weigh in tomorrow. I know what my own scales suggest, but I'm keeping my own counsel on that until after tomorrow night's WI. I'm not dreading it as much as last week, though. Will update tomorrow!
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